I’m trying an experiment this week. Spring has finally arrived and with it the desire to change my eating habits and break my cravings for the heavy, filling foods of winter. I feel like I’ve been hitched to Oprah’s infamous wagon of fat for months now, dragging it around with me. I’m just feeling… gross. Thanks a lot, Winter. It happened again.
So this week, I’m not planning meals and I’m going to do as little cooking as possible. I suppose you could call this my version of a raw foods diet. I feel like I could use a little detox at the moment and the thought of eating clean, crisp, simple flavors really appeals to me.
I told my husband of my plans to not have official dinners and he looked at me like I had told him I was leaving him. When I followed it up by telling him that we were not going to eat meat all week, he almost strangled me. But, he’s feeling just as tubby as I am so eventually he relented. (Note: My husband is one of those annoying people who are genetically thin and wired with a high metabolism. When he feels “tubby”, he’s referring to the 1/4 inch of fat he can pinch. If I wasn’t married to him, I’d hate him.)
I went to Whole Foods and I’m now stocked up on who knows what. I hate going “off script” there. When I don’t follow a strict list in that place I end up at the check-out line wondering what the hell I bought and what the hell was so expensive.
So we’re basically going to raid the fridge all week long. I stocked up on veggies and other stuff (but no meat!) like hummus and whole grains, and I’m giving myself the week off from cooking real meals. [What have I done?!]
I honestly don’t exactly know what’s in my fridge at the moment. And tomorrow I’ll probably be beating myself up over the fact that there are no plans for mac and cheese or burgers or pizza. But I’m just going to make do with what I have… and maybe I’ll even get rid of stuff I’ve had in the pantry. It’s like… spring cleaning! Get rid of some of this excess tonnage, get rid of stuff in the pantry and see where it goes.
I could see this going a few ways, most of which entail me trying not to eat the sofa cushions because I’m starving to death.
The panic is starting to settle in…
- Did I buy enough food?
- Will we just end up scarfing everything down in one night because we’re so hungry?
- Will we run out mid-week and (gasp!) have to go to the store before the weekend?
- Will we end up ordering in every night?
- Will I go crazy and try to eat my child?
These are questions that will soon have answers, be them good or bad. I know that tonight at around 6 or 7 in the evening, I’m going to be standing in front of the wide-open fridge saying “What the fuck? Where’s the food?!”
The reality of it all is starting to settle in. I’m not sure I can eat raw veggies all week. I might lose it. Who can live like this?! Cheeseburgers and fries were invented for a reason! God, I’m so hungry… already. Someone order me a pizza, stat!